On a euphoric ride of renewal.
It seems but a moment ago that I was trailing the end of one era and beginning the next, not sure on what would be happening, where the time would take me and how would fit back into a hard-caliber learning curve, and the social circles involved within it. Yet, as crazy and uncertain as the ballsy move was:
- I made friends… lots of them.
- I’ve supported people through their problems with work and personal lives
- I’ve started a radio show and fundamentally swayed the radio society into new ideas and improvements.
- I became a course representative for my year group.
- There’s not a day goes by that isn’t busy for me. I have never worked so hard.
- I’ve shed almost 2 stone in weight.
The me of the past would look at this very short yet poignant list and gawk. Especially the weight loss – something which I thought would be a never ending process that I would never see the beginning of. Yet I wake up in the morning and I see a constantly stronger and slimmer me. Not only that, but I see and stronger-minded me. Even with the rules and regulations prevalent in a university, I feel I ave been set free from a drab little cage that I put myself into, pulled in by its limitations and leadership. Yes it gave me insight that I would never have gained otherwise, yes it gave me the knowledge to be in the course I now study under to begin with. A cage it still is but, the importance of knowing that is committing myself to never repeating it ever again.
I have found a hope – one brighter than all the stars in the galaxy for a renewed and empowered me. In all of this, there is now a multitude of people I wish to go back to (even now), to look straight in the eye and say, “Look. Look at what I’ve achieved. Look what I have been able to beat, look what I have become.” I hope there’s a couple of people especially that I will meet again in the future, so they can appreciate what I’ve changed in myself and accomplished. Who knows what the future might hold with this newly found sense of wonder. I will go to them, and tell them the old me was a coward and a liar to himself.
I still miss them. Even today, after all this time.