Embrassing the tempest.
Finding independence in a world that demands just the opposite. Thinking about it, other than some brief moments and pushing to maybe a couple of months, I’ve not been without someone close by for confidentiality or intimacy. This is not to say I actively seek out chances of 1 night stands and the immediate disconnection from the formidable partner the next day – I despise the very idea. Yet it’s still difficult to come to terms; there is presented a chasm where the demi-god once resided. The books are closed, the loose ends are dealt with and as such, unless some form of neutrality is restored across a veritable peace summit, closure is finally upon me to enact.
The progress of self continues on, I’ve shed even more pounds and for the first time in nearly a decade I have a defining jawline. Something of an asset that I have yet to see distinct advantage in, but I’m ever hopeful of the razor-blade companies falling over themselves to ask me in for a campaign push. If there is one advantage I’ve seen immediate improvement in, it’s that I have no fear of being vocal about my problems any more. I’ve been confident in acting upon and vocalising them directly to the people whom I feel should feel listen without fear of rejection or a bout of ignorance on the subject matter. “Screw the rules I have a bone to pick.” may seem rather undiplomatic, but I’ve found swift action tends to trump the bureaucratic mess that almost always gets bundled in the gently-gently approach. Serious matters are of course an exception and demand saintly patience. There in lies a particular lesson I witnessed today with a lecturer whose personal and rather outreaching political views were preached out to a group of mature but still very impressionable students who for the most part will take on board the comments and opinions made, viewing them as canon and immovable from notepads and lecture notes and year-group over. I was swift to act upon it with a stern but open ended email, to which I would hope so see a positive result for the students involved.
So here it is to independence. Let us see where this takes me.
I’m the king of my own land.
Facing tempests of dust, I’ll fight until the end.
Creatures of my dreams raise up and dance with me!
Now and forever, I’m your king!